Did you know that… Your mind is a door. The problem with Doors is that they can become unhinged.
Ask yourself one question: Do you yearn for the gravy of man? And if you yearn for it, would you sell it to make a quick buck?
Welcome to a world of meat, where life is cheap and organs are plentiful. As long as sapient life exists in our universe, there will be a demand for organs. Welcome to Space Warlord Organ Trading Simulator. A game that will leave you hollow inside. One that will bend your mind and reduce you to a quiverring mass of misery and chaos the likes the universe has never seen.
You play as a nameless organ trader, buying and selling the vital organs of life on the black market. Your only goal, profit, no matter the cost to others. Your mission, to break free of the evil hand of your manipulative and maliciously malevolent master – Mentaur Minter.
If sacrificing your sanity sounds like a good idea, this is the game for you. No longer will you cling to the waning threads that once resembled humanity as you are sucked into a meaty vortex of pulsating flesh, dragged screaming into an abyssal miasma from which there is no escape.
You start out, as every organ trader does, a harmless looking puppy looking to make his way in the world. In time, you change to an evil galactic warlord as you corner the market in this horrifying trading simulator.
The game is simple, get out there into the organ pit and buy as many organs as your clients need, fulfilling their twisted desires, and insatiable appetites until you find clients more twisted and horrifying than you had even considered, clients who have plans for universal domination.
Along the way you upgrade your ship, choosing to sacrifice refrigeration for space as you try to pack as many organs into your vessel as it will hold. You have to contend with horrendous rivals who seek to deprive you of the organs you seek.
Not only can you trade these squishy and useful lumps of flesh, you can invest in stock on the evil organ stock market. The universe is your oyster, and it’s an oyster full of suffering.
As your prestige increases, the requests of your clients get more and more complex, you have to learn the complex formula for trading organs you wish you’d paid for, and every deal that looks good usually works out badly for you in the long run. There are no good endings, there is only pain, suffering and a dark neverending supply of squishy organs, splattering across the cosmos…
The writing for the game is terrifyingly disturbing, and the endings are so beautifully half assed and hilarious that they were worth every penny I paid.
Space Warlord Organ Trading Simulator… It’s more than a game, it’s a way of life…
And just remember… What happened to Mentaur, might happen to you…
